I really have a dilemma... and it's NOT the Cab vs. Merlot-
My brother sent me the picture.... he's a full on Marine Warrior (you can scroll down and see him if ya want)- but he saw it and Holy Spirit quickened to his heart ... that this is who i am in the Spirit....(there is another picture that i will blog on later... it's the other part.) But for now.... this is where i'm at.... My heart is to see each one that i have the privilege and HONOR of meeting - walk in the fullest freedom that has been ordained for them. I'm willing ONLY by the Grace of God... to go all the way in to see a POW/MIA- set free. But what i despise is the "fall out"- the passive aggressive crap that i get while in the midst. I know it's some of the warfare.. but "friendly fire" ain't friendly! I have always at least TRIED to be honest, real and authentic- but for what ever reason that pisses some off.
So how do i stand in a place of TRUTH... that we're all screwed up except for the Grace of God that is in the Active Process of transforming US. - which means granting grace to where each is in the process and not taking the transference personally. My friend Derek Chapman calls it "holding the container"- which is a great frame... but there are times when i really want Smith Wigglesworth mantle... and punch something evil. I'm really trying to be vulnerable here... on a freakin public blog.... It's no wonder why there are soooooo many Pastors in burn out mode. I read something about "sheep bites"- that they are the most infectious bites someone could get in the natural. Well in the Spirit it takes on a whole different level. It's aim is to KILL! I'm NOT trying to be dramatic... embellish... or over enunciate the plight of a warrior. But there are sooooo few that actually know... perceive... or understand the other side of it. The place where i want to collapse... into the arms of my Jesus.... and say..... "be my defense" - sometimes TRUE HUMILITY... is NOT denying the Authority in which one has been graced to walk.
It always seems to be Miss.Interpreted that likes to twist things, based on subjective findings. I'm not implying gender here... however... more than the masculine.... it is often the broken feminine that seems to be wielding that sword. Let me elaborate a bit more fully- at the speculation that i might be miss-interpreted. The true masculine is the place of initiating.... where as the true feminine is the place of responding. When distortion is present... the receiver is damaged... so that everything is perceived from a place of threat. Jesus himself could appear in manifested form/ theophany if you will- and the person would be asking .... "is this an angel of light?"- implying falseness. i know this is a Dennis Miller like rant... but had to get it out here....
Lord heal my heart- give me YOUR perspective on the matter- the places where i feel the stones of judgment being hurled. I can't walk this walk that You have called me to without YOUR unoffendable HEART.